dreams

The Day I refused To Say Goodbye to My Mother

The year of coming apart By Michael Petrilli

 

There’s something about losing a mother that is permanent and inexpressible. It’s a wound that will never quite heal. The death of my mother makes me realize that every single moment we spent together; I wasted an opportunity to tell her how much I love her and how much she means to me. Death has separated us very quickly; I didn’t have enough time to tell her how much I love her and how it’s unbearable to live without her. I thought that there are no Goodbyes between us, because it’s too painful and unfair. Although you are too far from here but never far from my heart, have I known one day we will meet and be together again; but until that day comes I want you to know that I will miss you more than any words can be said and I will never stop thinking of you until my time comes. I will always whisper words to God where you might hear me through, but I’m sorry I will never say good bye. I can’t see you anymore, but you are always at my side. I have faith my mother, but it’s my heart that doesn’t because there is no cure for that. God saw you getting so tired and no cure can cure you, he has chosen you for a better mission he has taken you to a better home to rest. With a tearful eyes and broken heart I watched you fading away, and did nothing except crying. It’s a very painful experience and a harsh one yet, I know you are in a better place but it’s me who can’t survive the fact of the non existence of you. I’m not sure exactly how heaven will look like, but I’m sure it’s your best cure my pure mother. The day I refused to say Goodbye to my mother, Outside the grief people may not understand that I didn’t just lose a person at one point in time, I have lost a mother whom I have lost her presence in every aspect of my life my future has changed even my “now”. Goodbyes will never be my type my mother, till we meet again my beloved.

 

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The Thing about Symbols

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Earlier in the ancient history ancient people innovated their own language that can be named as language of symbols in which each symbol they drew resembles a letter, they created their own language the language of symbols where you can type your name in different shapes. A letter can be written by one or more symbol.  Symbols must resemble something not only letters or words.  The Chinese language also is about symbols, letters are written in squares, lines and different signs no one can understand it except them or people who learned their language.

The Ojibwa the Native American speakers who exists in both United States and Canada had a legend about the origin of what is so called the dream catcher. A dream catcher is another kind of symbols that resembles a protective webs made by mothers and grandmothers to prevent bad dreams from entering. It’s like  a spider web with charms, beads, feathers and arrow heads it’s known that nothing can go through a spider’s web without being stuck and prevented from going through. The dream catchers have the same idea mothers and grandmothers created two spider webs decorated by some feathers and other stuff and called it a dream catcher they hung it on an individual’s bed or a baby’s cradle to catch all of a person’s dreams trapping the bad ones preventing it to go through the dream catcher and make the only good ones pass.

Also Native Americans believes that night air carries both good and bad dreams. The dream catcher is hung on a bed where it swings freely in the air beautifully catches all the dreams good and bad; only the good ones know how to slip and pass through the holes of the web. However some people uses the dream catcher to only decorate their room they have only fall for the part of or the fact of it’s a dream catcher it catches the dreams but not believing it it’s just a catchy name you know? It sounds interesting and fun.

That’s the thing about symbols; symbols might carry meanings, legendaries or storytelling some will be interested to know and some will only fall for the shape of the symbol.

There is another kind of symbols also, the one that is used in encoding this kind of symbols has its own type of people let’s say the freak or the ones who are addicted to technologies and hacking systems and computer issues.  All symbols believed to be loved in one way or another it carries an untold story untold mysteries maybe a hidden universe.

People make their own way through their journeys in life at some period at an unprepared moment they fall for a symbol  by coincidence search for its history make it their own kind of symbol use it almost in everything from the very moment their eyes fell on it.  Use it in accessories, printed tees, shoe, and mobile covers etc. it’s their symbol now.

Uncountable symbol languages everywhere in this world, people love to know how their names will be written in Chinese, Pharaonic,  Turkish, Greek, Russian etc. they even customize their names on a piece of accessory proud of how their names looks nice in those symbols. Again a symbol carries a mystery inside that no one will ever undergo yet it’s a beautiful mystery that doesn’t need to be uncovered. It’s just enough to fall for it loves it and be addicted to it.

The symbol you choose to love or the symbol that chose you somehow it resembles you without noticing and that is the thing about symbols it’s mysterious and the mystery catches you like a dream catcher. Each person in this world has his own kind of symbol whether a cool text sign, pictures or a one he/she invented;  a person with no symbol is like a text without emoticons and that’s the thing about symbols.